What I'm Aiming For This Year...

I know that it is nearly March and the time for New Year's resolutions is VERY late at this point. But as I approached the new year in 2009, I wasn't sure what I wanted to do. I now know and I guess it was just time that I needed to figure it out.

I know that there are many things that I need to change about myself as far as health is concerned. Today as of right now, I have had no cigarettes, which is a plus for me. This is my official quit date. Please pray that I am able to make it this time. I know I am. I need to do some other things as well, like make sure I take all my medications when I am supposed to and go to bed EVERY night, not just two or three times a week like I have been. But what I want to say now that I am aiming for is goals within myself, for myself.

For starters, the word I choose to be my word for the year, RESPONSIBLE, isn't quite how I have been lately. I have missed a lot of appointments with lots of people lately and I hate when I do that, I know THEY all HATE it when I do that. It's not right nor is it professional. So I am going to start trying to be more responsible in making appointments and commitments that I make to others. Another thing is that I talked to my friend a while ago and she was telling me that working on yourself and focusing on what you need for yourself right now might be the best thing for you. So I think I need to do that. I want to start focusing on myself and doing what Christy needs and to improve herself to be that person I want to be; happy!

Now I know they say not to set to many goals at one time so that if they all or some fail, then you won't feel bad. So for now, I am going to focus for the month of March on the smoking, and then towards the end of the month or in April, start to go up to my gym here at my apt. I mean I have this great 24 hour full access gym that is available to me and I have use it in the past but I NEED to get back there again. Baby steps, lol, for now. Stop the smoke, then start the gym.

These are my goals for now and through-out the year, they may change and I may add more. I just know that in order for me to feel better, something has to change for the better.

A Little Late - My Word Of The Year--> Responsible!

I have never chosen a word to go by for a year until now, so this should be interesting. I thought long and hard about the word before choosing it and when I picked "responsible", it just seemed to fit. I know that I need to work on a lot of things that require responsibility which may be why I chose this word. I figure it is time for me to get on with improving myself and to stop relying on everyone else to do everything else for me and for me to take the responsibility.

I need to take better care of myself when it comes to my medication, this is also why I chose this word. I want to become healthier in 2010, and I think I didn't want to say "I want to go to the gym x amount of times and eat this or that". But rather, take responsibility for what it is I do eat and what activities I do partake in and don't partake in. It all add up to me and equals out to being a more responsible person who takes control of her health.

Trying Again...

Well, I have started the Chantix again in my 2nd attempt to quit smoking this year. I really feel that I will make it this time and this is because #1 roommate Tami is going to stop with me, & #2 Nick doesn't live here anymore. So that takes two smokers out of my home that were such a temptation for me last time. I have a really good attitude this time also, not that I didn't last time, but I just feel differently now.

So wish me luck!

Kevin's 18th & Kristin's 16th Birthday Celebration!!!

I still cannot believe that I am the mom of an 18 year old son and a 16 year old daughter. I tell you that I couldn't be more pleased with these two. As they have made my life something worthwhile and something to look forward to in the future.

This picture above is when Kevin and Kristin where first starting to open their gifts from everyone. They just are so photogenic, that's just because they are so good looking :) LoL Ok ok, I'm a little biased...what mother isn't?

I got Kevin a really nice leather wallet and then put some cash in it along with Tami's gift which was a pre-paid credit card and this is the look on his face when he realized what it was...LoL! Now he's official, as he said. He walked around the whole afternoon with that card in his hands and just thought he was "IT"! It was great!!!

I decided that since this was Kristin's Sweet 16, she deserved something special to signify the day and to let her know how truly priceless she is to me.

So I got her a heart shaped ring in her birthstone of Garnet with little cz stones on each side of it. It's a beautiful ring and she just fell in love with it. I hope she never forgets how much she is loved whenever she looks at that ring.

The day was a definite success and I learned again how beautiful and priceless my kids are. Not that I ever forget that, but when a special day comes you see it in such a way that really makes you step back and look at them, I mean REALLY LOOK at these two. Kevin has got to be the most innocent creature on this planet, he is so kind, caring, and so sweet in his tender ways with others. He's right there to stick up for someone and to help another out. Kristin is a thing of beauty in her own right as well. She has a mind and a will of her own that can be called nothing but strong. I so look forward to seeing how these two turn out and what becomes of their lives and what directions they will take. I know that I am a sappy mom, and I will most likely cry as they move on as I already have. I love you Kevin and Kristin, you are what makes up my heart and my life couldn't have been what it is without you both in it. I am so proud to be your mom Kevin, and your mommy Kristin.

I'm so proud of my kiddo's Kevin and Kristin

Just this past Monday, the 1st of February, the school they attend had a walk out to get voters attention to show them how important it was for the 3rd attempt in a year to get a levy passed. I am just so very proud of Kevin and Kristin for taking part in this, their first rally/protest/voter awareness...what have you.

Kevin is a Junior at Little Miami HS and is very active in the track team and Kristin is a Sophomore who is on the golf team who's coach has mentioned more than once to her that she is scholarship material when it comes to the sport. The levy DID NOT PASS, and so I do not know what the future will bring for Kevin and Kristin and the other students there. It's not just sports that are being cut, but music could possibly be cut entirely and Kristin has played the flute for LM since she was in Jr High and is VERY GOOD, I might add :). AP classes are also being cut, larger classrooms are being formed which puts a hinder on everyone!

They say the next step is that the State of Ohio will take over the run of the school, but I heard today they are going to try once more with a new levy vote.

So let's hope that this isnt the end for my kids future at their school and that they will have an excellent education to carry on with them to college.

Merry Christmas to All!!!

I just wanted to wish you all a very Merry Christmas. Be safe on your travels, and have a wonderful time with your loved ones. :)

Food?!? What's That?!?

Well as it is slowly turning into Christmas Eve/Day, I am going now for what seems like a long time on mac/cheese, instant potatoes, and instant pancakes...oh let's not forget a few rolls of TP and no kleenex to boot so my body of course decides to get sick now and I have to use the little bit of TP that's left as tissue to blow my freakin nose. :( I have never been so poor in my life than I am at this moment. I am not trying to get pity, I am venting.

I just am having hard time getting in Christmas mood when I feel like crap and would rather crawl into a hole instead of show myself in this state. I didn't go overboard on Christmas gifts for anyone this year and while in my present state of finances is a good thing, I feel bad because I usually DO go all out for everyone. I didn't even send out any cards this year, which is unlike me. Maybe I am being a Scrooge, or a Grinch...I just know that I am very unhappy this year compared to all other Christmas's past.

I'm optimistic though, so I am hoping for a better New Year!

My lack of patience, the phone charger, and Suzie's advice...

Have you ever had one of those days where you just knew your gut instinct was dead on? That you were so right about the situation and you knew it all and nothing or noone could tell you different. Ever have one where you thought that and you were dead OFF? Well that was me this past week with Jeff. Yes, we have officially had our first fight over something soooo stupid and small, and I even went to the lenght of telling him that it was over between us. WOW!!! Christy, what a fool you made of yourself! Let me tell you all that happened:

It was this past Wednesday, the day before Gobble Day (as I have officially dubbed it). Jeff came down on Tues. as planned and talked about how his mom wanted to see him during the holiday, which I can completely understand. So Weds. afternoon around 2:30 Jeff said he was going to goto KY. to see his family which was about 45-60 minutes away from my place here in Ohio. 'I'll be back around 6-6:30 and we will go out to dinner then...blah blah blah'. Again, I have absolutely no quams with this at all, I was all for it. So 6 comes and theres no word from Jeff, 6:30...still no word. I didn't hear from him until 12:40AM that night. Needless to say Christy was a wee bit worried and ticked-off as well. When he contacted me, he merely text me, no phone call. He said he would call me when he got to his grandmothers place where everyone was meeting up at. (I must back-track...he said his grandma was in hospital and had a stroke. He was not thinking straight and that was his reason for not calling me.) So he text "I will call when I get there", no call was ever made nor received. Again, Christy was none too happy.

So the next day, after I was up the whole night wondering what was going on with Jeff and I, I decided to text him and ask what his plans were for the day...no response. I called, no answer. So my mind is of course going EVERYWHERE WRONG & EVIL at this point. Who is he really with, what's really going on? Blah blah blah!?!? So I text him and said forget it, we are done. Still no responce even from that, which I was shocked alittle at.

I ended up spendind Gobble Day alone, which is what I really wanted. I was in no shape to face family, I was to angry and sad. I didn't want to be a downer on their day.

So in the middle of the night again around 11 or 12 that same evening, Jeff text me and we were able to communicate some. I do not like to do these sort of things over text, its silly to me to do that. He wouldn't call me still, but he was texting me continually for about 45 mins to an hour or so. I felt some better, he and I made up as best a couple can through texting.

He called the next morning and his voice was so good to hear and we talked more and now things are back to normal. I will get to see my sweetie tomorrow (Tues 12-1-09) for the first time since all this happened and I can't wait to just get a huge bear hug from him.

Now...the phone charger, lol...well, you see he kinda left that here and I threw it away. No biggie right? Yeah that's what I thought, I figured he won't be coming back here so he won't need this anymore, it's trash, its gone. So I'm talking to Suzie a little after I pitched the charger and she asked me "Did you cut it up?", "NO! But what a great idea!" So yea, I am buying him a NEW WHOLE charger now as I type (Tami is getting it for me with my $). LOL!!!

So that is what happened to me over my Holiday. It was horrible. If I had MORE PATIENCE IN ME, none of this would have happened. I really need to learn how to practice patience. Anyone have any advice on that they could tell me? As you read, I need it. I could have lost something great, possibly the best thing in my life (man wise).

In One Word...

1. Where is your mobile phone? desk
2. Your hair? black
3. Your mother? sweet
4. Your father? gone
5. Your favorite food? steak
6. Your dream last night? talkative
7. Your favorite drink? milk
8. Your dream/goal? cards
9. What room are you in? dining
10. Your hobby? scrapbooking
11. Your fear? alone
12. Where do you want to be in 6 years? Jeff
13. Where were you last night? bed
14. Something that you aren't? doctor
15. Muffins? pan
16. Wish list item? cuttlebug
17. Where did you grow up? Cincinnati
18. Last thing you did? dinner
19. What are you wearing? P.J.'s
20. Your TV? Shrek
21. Your Pets? cats
22. Friends? roommate
23. Your life? romance
24. Your mood? manic
25. Missing Someone? Jeff
26. Vehicle? Toyota
27. Something you’re not wearing? braces
28. Your favorite store? Joanns
29. Your favorite colour? pink
30. When was the last time you laughed? today
31. Last time you cried? yesterday
32. Your best friend? Tami
33. One place that I go to over and over? scraptable
34. Facebook? yes
35. Favorite place to eat? O'Charleys

Challenges from SFTIO

The one group that I have belonged to the longest and have participated in the most is Scrapbooking From The Inside Out (SFTIO). There are two links to this kit club on my blog main page.

What I love about this group so much and why I have stayed an active member for close to a year now (3/09 is when I joined), is the women involved and their caring and ever readiness to help, listen, console, share, etc. in EVERYTHING that is going on in someones life. No matter how small or big, these ladies are here for me and I love them dearly. I have never met any of them personally but we are all so active on the message boards that I feel I know them well and they know me.

My involvement in this group is my favorite thing to do by far on the internet and off the net (to scrapbook the challenges of the group of course! lol).

Each month we cover a different emotion/topic and this month we are working on "Generosity". Below is the first challenge that I have completed. The link should take you directly to the challenge.
http://www.scrapbookingfromtheinsideout.com/board/index.php?showtopic=1662

This is the title of the LO:
Here is the LO:

The ScrapRoom Weekly Blog Challenge {Week #45}

THIS WEEK'S CHALLENGE: Create a layout with at least one photo and some interesting facts or tidbits about YOU!

TITLE OF LO:

ANGLED VEIW #1

ANGLED VIEW #2

FULL 2 PAGE LAYOUT VIEW

New Personal Challenge "Book A Month"

I was sitting here talking to Tami (roommate - you'll see this name a lot), and discussing how I have so many books ~ (3 full bookcases and then some) ~ and how little I have actually read. I mean I bet you out of all of those books I have only read or started to read only a very small handful of them. Don't get me wrong, I do love the books I have, or at least WANT to love them and know them inside and out but just have a hard time reading.

I have ADD and I think that had a big thing to do with why I read very little. I found it hard to get into books or finish them. So here is what I have decided to do. Every month starting this month, I am going to read one book. I know that to some one book take only a few days, but with me I am just a very slow reader and take me awhile. If I can get more in and have time, I will. I think I am going to like this. It is not a challenge that is so far over the top that I can't accomplish it, it is attainable.

Here is the first book I have chosen to read:

Book Title: 1603: A Turning Point in British History

Author: Christopher Lee

Pages: 368
Book Description:
1603 was the year that Queen Elizabeth I, the last of the Tudors, died. Her cousin, Robert Carey, immediately rode like a demon to Scotland to take the news to James VI. The cataclysmic time of the Stuarts had come and the son of Mary Queen of Scots left Edinburgh for London to claim his throne as James I of England.

Diaries and notes written in 1603 describe how a resurgence of the plague killed nearly 40,000 people. Priests blamed the sins of the people for the pestilence, witches were strangled and burned and plotters strung up on gate tops. But not all was gloom and violence. From a ship's log we learn of the first precious cargoes of pepper arriving from the East Indies after the establishment of a new spice route; Shakespeare was finishing Othello and Ben Jonson wrote furiously to please a nation thirsting for entertainment.

1603 was one of the most important and interesting years in British history. Christopher Lee, acclaimed author of This Sceptred Isle, unfolds its story from first-hand accounts and original documents to mirror the seminal year in which Britain moved from Tudor medieval ism towards the wars, republicanism and regicide that lay ahead.

I really hope that I succeed with this and EVERY monthly goal. I think I will become a more rounded individual. I have a lot of classics here as well that I want to sink my teeth into. As well as a lot of non-fiction covering topics A to Z.

I think I can do this

Well today marks the first day that I have NOT had a cigarette. Not really even any cravings and I am thrilled to death about that! I just woke up today and felt really great, I didn't think about it first thing in the morning, nor when I finished eating. I am just tickled, teehee!

I am just wondering if I had to let the larger dosage of the Chantix get into my system. Either way, I'm doing it.

Today is the first day of the rest of my life smoke free!

Insomnia Bites

I have suffered from insomnia for a long time now it seems. I don't know the last time I was able to go a whole week or even 3 days in a row sleeping at night. I know that this just messes me up all around, I am yawning now as a matter of fact but sleep I will not. I've been up all night again.

Part of my trouble is that I have such God awful nightmares and I honestly hate to sleep. I use to love to sleep and just couldn't wait til night to come. Now I dread it. Don't get me wrong, I mean I do things in the night while everyone is sleeping...I make cards or scrapbook mainly. Get caught up on paper work or clean. I do kind of like the alone time and the solitude of the night. I remember I would get angry when I was not left alone in the night to have "Christy's time". Now I don't really care, because I have a bigger place now that I am kind of alone anyway.

I created this LO with a cute lil' Garfield sleeping on a pillow b/c it represents what I want, peace and comfort. I would love to relax like that at night and just aaaaaah, sleep.

Much Harder Than I Thought, Need Some Help

This is so much harder than last time. So far I am becoming the most irritable person I know. I am just one big fit of BLAH waiting to go off at aNytHiNG!!! I WANT A CIGARETTE SO BAD!!!!

The last time that Iquit and was on the Chantix pill I did great, I went over 3 months with not a one puff! Not even really wanting one or real cravings. Now I don't know what't going on!?! Im frustrated at that. I mean this pill is supposed to help right? It did before, why not now? ARGGHhh!

I am trying to drink a lot of water as well. I know that if I get the nic-0-crap out of my system, that will help. Doesn't help when I am puffing here and there though.

I just wish I knew of something to help me when I get the cravings and then get so angry when I tell myself "no". I mean I can try meditation or something, but I know for a fact that that won't help this, at least not at the beginning when the cravings are so bad and I get so moody with it.

Any ideas?

Things I Won't Miss About Smoking (QUITTING TODAY!!!)

Since I am quitting smoking today, I thought a list of things I won't miss would be appropriate and fitting.

1. I won't miss spending all that money on cigarettes anymore.
2. I won't miss being out of breath when I climb up to my third floor apartment
3. I won't miss people looking at me funny with dirty looks
4. I wont miss the smelling of smoke or the look that is has on my walls (even though I have only smoked indoors for about 4 months vs. the whole time I have lived here, I am sure there is some yellowing of the walls).
5. I won't miss having the jitters when I "feel" the urge to light up, anxiety will be handled another way.
6. I won't miss "Smokey Breath" that I actually call myself sometimes because of smoking
7. I won't miss any health related problems that I am avoiding now by quitting.
8. I won't miss smoke in my eyes when I have my glasses on (for some reason it always gets caught between lens and eye)
9. I won't miss always wondering when or where I will be able to have my next cigarette
10. The most important thing I won't miss...is the gained time I will have to spend doing things that I enjoy and spending it with people I enjoy

Limitless Imagination

What I am hoping to accomplish here with this blog is to get more out of myself; to stretch myself to the limit and beyond when it comes to scrapping and my inner/personal self. I want to know myself better and to have this prove as record of what goes on and what happens in this "journey of self discovery".

Let's Begin

Today is the first day of writing in this new blog. I am still trying to make it my own and get comfortable with it. I chose the name of the blog My SLICE of Life because of my love of scrapbooking and cardmaking with use of the Slice Machine, lol. I wanted to incorporate something I use and love with the craft into the name of the blog. Hope it's not to corny.

I started to take Shimelle's Blogging for Scrapbooker's and so far I am already behind, what a surprise. I will get caught up by this evening though. I hope! :)